I always quote Norah when I want to tell the world what my frustration used to be—you know, “that feeling when you just want the right thing to fall into the right place, not only because it’s right, but because it will mean that such a thing is still possible”.
Throughout my first three years in college, I wanted to believe that it was still possible to have someone like you in my life. Of course, I had to make wrong choices first—trying to find it in people who were never meant to mean something to me like you do. All I got was heartbreak and you knew that. You saw how I cried over silly crushes and thought that the world was going to end.
I liked having you around. You gave sound advice and stuck with me despite my kaartehan. I remember one time that I didn’t speak to you for an entire day purposely and even gave you a mock standing ovation. I don’t know why I did that but come the end of the day, you were still there asking me what was wrong.
At some point though, you went missing. When I try to recall how it happened (not WHY it happened ’cause we all know that), I can’t pinpoint details. All I know is that the YM conversations slowly vanished and the tambays slowly faded away. Deep inside me though, I knew that the connection would never be gone. I knew that you were still there.
And I guess you knew that I was still there, too. You somehow come crashing in again into my life during my fourth year. Surprisingly, it was as if we never left each other’s lives. I didn’t know what I was missing at that time until you entered the picture again—and I somehow found myself liking having you around more than usual. And you somehow had me around more than usual, too. And the rest, as they say, is history.
You taught me to grow up and break away from my Sesame Street world where everything is perfect and childlike. You taught me to work for the things I value and to not just sit around and wait for Prince Charming to do everything for me. You taught me to become more mature and to understand that I can’t always set high expectations on people and expect them never to disappoint me. You taught me to stand up for myself. You taught me to immediately check myself when I did something wrong and ask for forgiveness. You taught me to be more confident and to believe that I am worth it.
Most importantly, you showed me that the right thing can fall into the right place at the right time. After all has been said and done, no matter what has happened in the past and what will happen in the future, we have chemistry and timing—and I will never regret having you in my life to remind me to use liquid sanitizer before eating and to tell me to turn my laptop off and sleep at night.
I guess all I want to say is thank you.
Thank you, too:
It’s hard to grow up as a pastor’s kid because most people get scared of you. Fortunately, I have good friends around :) To my bespren, we’ve been through almost everything that friends can face. I’m glad that we’re still friends now :) Thank you for sticking around even though I’m probably the most malabo friend to be with.